Bird of the Week: The Shoebill
Hello, Reader, and welcome to BirdInspector! I know we're all thinking it, so I'm just going to say it. What the fuck with this thing. Why does it look like this? What cruel joke did evolution play on this poor bird. Reader, I'm sorry that you have to look at this, but as a journalist I will not stop until I report on every single bird. And Reader, maybe I'm just being too harsh. I'll admit that I purposely choose a bad picture of it for the Wow Factor. From some angles they look pretty cool:
And for a second I'm like, "Okay. This bubby looks kinda rad." But then I see one like this:
and Reader, it's just hard for me to respect someone who looks like that. I mean, I'm sure he's a nice guy and all, but come on! What a buffoon!
FOR REAL READERS ONLY: Reader, it's Jacob. A man took a large amount of my money to give our site a "Statistical Analysis". It all just happened so fast and I didn't know what was going on. He told me that our site gets more views when I make fun of the birds, but really I love all birds and speaking ill of them makes me feel bad, but if it's what the people want...